Friday, August 24, 2012

The Little Treasures She Has Given Me

My darling baby girl,

There are so many things from this first year or so of your life
that I wish I could somehow find a way to capture forever...

Your "baby" smell that has been gone for some time now.
I miss being engulfed by that sweet scent 
when I pick you up and hold you close to me.
It only lasted a few months and I don't think I fully
appreciated it while it was present, but now, looking back,
it was such a great part of the beginning of our journey together.
This probably sounds silly, but that scent, your scent, 
seemed to match you and your personality perfectly.
Everything about it was Emma Claire Williams.
I wish a waft of it would come passing under my nose right now.

The feeling of your tiny hand tucked safely into mine as you fell asleep.
We always used to hold hands as you nursed.
Eventually your eyes would get too heavy for you to hold open,
your body would get loose and limp
and you would slowly drift off into your own little dream land,
but your hand always remained resting securely in mine.
It's as if they were meant to fit together.

The look on your face when you finally rolled 
from your back to your tummy for the first time.
Your Daddy and I had been waiting for you to do it for so long.
You seemed to be on the verge long before you actually did it
and we were always trying to get you to do it by strategically placing
different items out of your reach.  You would get up on your side
and turn your head, but you just could not get that shoulder to roll with you.
But finally, on your six month birthday, you did it, you became a roller!
And the face that came along with that first roll was priceless.
Your face just seemed to have,
"really, that's what you guys have been waiting for?"
written all over it.  Like it was no big deal.
But to Momma it was a big deal.
A special moment that I will always remember.

I could go on and on about these tiny treasures you have given me, 
so I will leave you with just one more.
The one that got this whole thought process started.
Your going to sleep sound.
Since you were just a month or so old
you have always made the same exact sound
as you are drifting off to sleep.
The best way I can think to describe it
is a long, continuous moan, but not a moan of pain,
more of a relaxed sounding moan.
You fight sleep so bad,
although it was much worse when you were younger.
I think you are just afraid of missing out on anything,
but whatever the cause, I always know that when the sleep sound
starts you are finally giving in and will be asleep in a matter of minutes.
But pretty much ever since we moved into the new house
and you started consistently putting yourself to sleep while reading,
the sleep sound has disappeared.
Now you just quietly fall asleep while looking at your book.
It's so precious and I love how much you love books,
but I have missed that sound that I grew so accustomed to.
Well, today as you were going down for your morning nap,
I heard that silly sound coming from your room once again.
A big smile immediately spread across my face
and as the sleep sound always indicates,
you were asleep within five minutes.
That sound is like music to my ears.
Not because you're about to be asleep and give me a break,
but because it's your sound and it's always been a part of you.
Even after it's gone, it will play on in my heart.

I love you Sleeping Beauty.
(the name your biggest sister gave you.)
I'm anxious to find more treasures left behind by you.

1 comment:

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